Can we talk for a moment about the Big Yarn Companies?

Because I love the yarns offered by Rowan.  They’re pretty, feel wonderful and tend to knit up beautifully.

And I love that Rowan offer pattern books designed around specific ranges of yarn.  The patterns are often pretty, and invariably showcase the unique aspects of the yarn very well.

But you’d think that, if anyone could get something as basic as photos of their pattern samples right, it’d be a large company like Rowan.  They’ve had years and years to get the hang of things, but they have a knack for making all the worst possible choices when it comes to how they photograph their samples.

Rowan recently brought out a new set of patterns to go with their “fine art collection” yarn range.  And as pretty as they are, I’m certainly not going to even consider  picking up the patterns until I’ve seen samples made by other knitters.  Here are some notable examples of the reason why:

Are we supposed to be looking at the scarf, the socks or the top?

“Sparrow”, this item is called.  Now, I’m a sucker for patterns named after birds, trees and woodland animals.  The names invite me in straight away.  But tell me, from looking at this picture, do you think we’re supposed to be looking at the socks, the scarf or the top the model is wearing?  Did you guess “socks”?  Congratulations!  Now, what can you tell me about those socks?  They look stripy.  Do they have a textural pattern?  What sort of heel do they have?  What sort of toe?  Is the striping an aspect of the yarn, or is it part of the pattern?  We’re zoomed so far out that I can barely make out anything except the socks are ankle length.

Who cares about seeing the item when the shadows look so pretty?

Here’s another very nice, artsy photo for the “Ibis” pattern.  Socks again, but thigh-high ones this time.  Of course, half the sock is hidden in deep shadow, and the cut of the coat worn by the model is such that we can’t actually make out the cuffs.  Note that between the shadows, the coat and her hands, we can’t see how the cuffs fit – do they pinch her thigh, causing it to bulge?  Are they baggy?  She’s also wearing shoes, so all we can actually see is that, again the socks are stripey.  So, how does this pattern differ from the previous once, except for length?  Do these socks have a textural pattern we can’t see?  Different heel/toe construction?  Is there any reason this is a separate pattern to “sparrow”, or could they have been the same pattern with a variable length option?

Finally, a close-up! Sort of.

At long last, we can actually see the socks!  This is “cuckoo”, a pattern which clearly has… some sort of cabled pattern on the side, and some sort of textural pattern.  This is one of the clearest photos of any item in the range, which should tell you something, really.  The deep shadows obscure the heel of the socks, but we can at least see the cuff and toe, and are close enough to make out some basic aspects of the pattern, although not with any detail.

Socks! No, wait… Scarf!

Before you shout “Socks!  Definitely socks!”, I should tell you that the pattern book does include scarves as well as socks, and that this pattern is called “goose”.  What do you think, is it the scarf?  Hard to tell from this zoomed out, but the colour of the scarf and the pattern of colours looks sort of like the colour of some birds, doesn’t it?  You’re going to guess scarf?  Congratulations, you’re… wrong.  Socks, again.  With the cuff partially hidden by the fringe of one of the two scarves the model is wearing, and the heels obscured by shadow.  And again, so much effort has been spent showing off the model and the setting, that the actual item is a tiny, not-terribly-clear part of the picture.

Socks!

I don’t think I even need to comment on the issues with the photo, at this point.

One thing I’ve learned about buying a pattern is that you do not pay for it unless the photo or photos:

  • Clearly show the item in question
  • Clearly show key design elements of the item, such as lacework, cuffs, construction
  • Do not conceal areas that can be signs of a poor pattern, such as cuffs, collars, seams etc through artsy posing
  • Show the item laid flat or otherwise displayed in a clear, simple way so the full shape and overall appearance can be seen

The simple reason for all of this being, it is very easy to make an otherwise poorly-fitted item look very good indeed if you take an “artsy” photo.  Just take a look in any women’s magazine at the fashion ads and you’ll see models contorted into poses no person would voluntarily, naturally stand in outside of a photoshoot, with the items of clothing pinned where you can’t see for better fit and rumpled, tucked, creased and oddly worn.  The photos look lovely, but you can’t even tell what neckline the item has half the time, let alone where the waist falls, how long the sleeves are or whether it’s a loose or tight fit.  This is all well and good for off-the-rack clothes, when you can walk in-store and actually pick up, view and try on the item in question.  It’s unforgivable when we’re talking about something that you’re going to need to buy the yarn and pattern for and spend hours or days of your precious time knitting.

Things are kind of in turmoil, right now.  Amongst other things, I seem to be having some rather serious difficulty accessing my Ravelry account.  I don’t know why.  In the meantime, here is this week’s Freebie Friday post, with patterns accessed thanks to a relative’s account.  Apologies if the post is a bit short on words, Stuff is Happening.  Sufficient to say I’ll be sorting out the problems with my Ravelry account when Stuff calms down enough that I have the time and energy to do so.

Freebie Friday rules are a little different to Ravelry Monday rules, and are as follows:

  • The pattern needs to be free.
  • The pattern does not HAVE to be a Ravelry download, but must be listed on Ravelry.
  • The pattern must have a photo clearly showing the item.
  • The pattern still needs to produce a professional looking item and have the necessary information for potential makers.
  • Clothing for adults must still be available in plus sizes.
  • An item showcased on Freebie Friday may still be showcased on Ravelry Monday, if it fits the brief for that day.

So, without further faffing, here are my favourite free designs of the week!

 

Lace Shawl with Diamond Pattern

A very pretty, delicate lace-wight shawl with an attractive leafy border.  Available as a free Ravelry download.

 

Tschuss Frau Holle

A simple but pretty aran-weight toque, with an attractive striped and spotted pattern.  Available as a free Ravelry download.

 

Construction Site Cowl

A unusual worsted-weight cowl with a fun pattern, ideal for working up in bright, contrasting colours.  Available as a free Ravelry download.

I want to start by saying that I understand other people’s perspectives.  This is an issue that hits close to the bone for a hell of a lot of people.  All the reactions I’ve seen to the post I’m talking about are VALID.  I just wanted to offer my own, and felt it better and less likely to fan the flames the Captain was trying to temper to wait and post on MY blog rather than adding to the masses of comments over there.

So, the good people over at Captain Awkward – both the contributors and the commentariat – have had a rather fraught few days since the Captain answered their latest letter, from a man concerned by the way his new-found feminist knowledge was interacting with his anxiety disorder.

The Captain interpreted the letter as being more about everyday, non-mental-illness anxiety, and as such as being yet another rehashing of the hundreds of comments on the original Schrodinger’s Rapist post, by men, upset that they suddenly had to think about the feelings of the women they meet.  The commentariat responded – and rightly so – by calling out the Captain’s complete dismissal of the part where the letter writer stated they had an anxiety disorder, as in capital-A Anxiety, and that in that context the “get a grip, stop bothering women” response felt ableist and triggering.

I’ve been silent in the comments and elsewhere, mostly reading and lurking a bit.  Now the comments sections of the relevant posts are closed, giving people time to cool down, I want to say a few things myself.  First, a bit of background information.

I’m a crazy person.

Well, okay, so actually I have some mental illness.  I have anxiety-related issues, depression-related issues, a long history of self-harm, and a list of Stuff the Doctors Note Down when Diagnosing that appears picked from a whole range of related disorders.  So I identify as Crazy.  I know it’s an ableist term, but I’m pro-reclaiming harmful words (I also identify as queer, for example), and I honestly find it easier to say “I’m crazy” than… that whole paragraph of non-answer I just gave.  Anyway, the point is that I am very intimately acquainted with the sort of emotional and mental baggage the letter writer deals with.

I also agreed with the Captain.

Now, that’s not to say I thought her reply was fine.  It was undeniably problematic.  And even if I didn’t personally think that, my own “I’m alright Jack” feelings do not, at all, in any sense, negate the triggers, the upset, the pain and the anxiety that others feel.  But I do want to offer my perspective.

Because having mental illness sucks.  Having mental illness that specifically impacts on your ability to Do People Stuff, like socialising, talking to people, etc, is especially fraught.  But when several people commented that it isn’t right to ask the letter writer to accept social anxiety as his lot in life, my thoughts went to this post and the comment threads in that.  The Awkward Dude Sagas.

In those posts, and the comments, there was quite a lot of discussion about the intersection between awkward/inappropriate behaviour and perceived disability.  Specifically, the fact that whenever a guy behaves inappropriately towards a woman, someone will defend him by saying that he might be AS” – that he might have Autism.  As people pointed out, having a spectrum disorder that can make social interaction and social cues more difficult to navigate doesn’t excuse the behaviour.  Put kindly, a person who behaves inappropriately should be called out for their behaviour.  If they don’t have AS, calling them out and following through on that  is the only way to make sure they know they need to behave.  If they’re predatory, it’s the only way to make sure they know they don’t have license to operate.  And if they do have AS, clear communication when they mess up is vital to help them learn.

But there’s an extra layer there, too.  One of my favourite comments on that post was this comment, by Kaz, who said,

Guess what? Most guys are pretty okay with body language and social cues. Most guys are much better on that front than I am, in fact! Because, you know, most guys are NT and I am actually on the autistic spectrum! And nobody’s ever cut me any slack when I struggle with the social cues surrounding romance and dating. Never mind the fact that for someone who’s read as female, the consequences for messing up can be *much much* worse for than for a guy. I mean, the last time I seriously misread signals in that context I was sexually assaulted? And it left me achingly aware of how vulnerable I am to that kind of thing happening again? So I’m afraid I don’t exactly have much sympathy for someone whose main problem with the amount of non-verbal language and subtle cues that happens re: romance is that it makes it hard for them to find a date!

And later in the comments,

The extra fun thing is that being a woman with AS can make you particularly vulnerable to sexual harassment, too! Both because there is no allowance made for women struggling with interpreting social cues correctly – in fact, a lot of the shit women get is predicated on that kind of thing: let us contemplate how the entire “what did you think would happen if you [went home with a guy/invited him to your room/smiled at him/wore a skirt/etc. etc.]” line of reasoning works out for Aspies, hm? – but also because those nice other aspects of AS that hardly ever get talked about can play into things. Things like sensory sensitivities and difficulty dealing with unexpected happenings and certain verbal issues that can crop up… …I find it ~hilarious~ that the behaviour that usually gets the “but but think of the men with AS!!!” treatment is usually behaviour that may be very dangerous for people with AS to be on the receiving end of. Frequently my answer to “we should tolerate X behaviour to make men with AS more welcome!” is “if you tolerate X behaviour, I am an Aspie who could not participate in that space at all.

To take the sheer awesome smack-down that is Kaz’ contribution and rework it for this particular issue,

It is horrible having an anxiety disorder.  Anxiety can make normal social interactions more difficult.  It sucks to be a man who finds it hard or triggering to try and socialise with women because his feminist learning conflicts with his jerk-brain.

But guys aren’t the only people who have mental health disorders.  And you know what else sucks?  Being a woman, aware of Schrödinger’s Rapist not just as a theory, some hypothetical, but as part of your lived experience of dealing with harassment and assault.  And also having an anxiety disorder.  Because we get no free pass, no allowance from guys who totally get it and understand that their desire to interact with us is triggering and upsetting in extra ways.  But we’re expected to shut the fuck up and deal.  We’re expected to not only deal with it, but find the spoons to dig our way out of an anxiety cycle enough to be civil, and understanding, and receptive to the triggering and unwanted attentions of the guy talking to us. 

Every day, we have to separate and manage our normal, bog-standard anxiety-about-predators from our Anxiety triggers.  That’s not fun, but it’s not ableist.  It’s normal everyday fucking life if you have anxiety.  Just as I have to separate my paranoid tendencies to assume the worst from my practical experience that sometimes I am in danger.  You know how the Gift of Fear is supposed to be a tool to help us stay safe?  Try working that into your life when you know – because it’s a medical fact – that your mental health issues mean your instincts often need to be second-guessed.  When you know that you actually sometimes CAN’T trust your own judgement, and when learning how to differentiate between the two is a long learning process.  It’s not ableist to say that this is work I need to do.  It’s a statement of fact.

The advice that says:

  1. Keep working on your mental health needs.
  2. You need to separate the rational anxiety about these social things from your irrational anxiety.
  3. Schrödinger’s Rapist actually provides a handy check-list of things to help you determine rationally whether approaching a woman is okay right now.
  4. There is no blanket solution by which we can absolve you of your responsibility or free you of your triggers.
  5. Also, what you’re asking sounds a hell of a lot like what non-anxiety-having guys ask about this exact same thing.  Same rules apply to all of you.

Is spot on.  Right on the money.  Guys with AS do not get a blanket free pass from not acting creepy.  Guys with Anxiety do not get a blanket free pass from not thinking about the needs of others.  I agree that the original response was overly-snarky (although snark is the default style of the CA archives, and the Captain is notorious for being strong-minded and direct when it comes to calling people out when they try and weasel for cookies and free passes), and I can see why some people were triggered by it.  But that doesn’t make it wrong advice.

That said, I know I get stuff wrong.  I don’t see what the difference is between the way we deal with the suggestion that AS people can’t help being socially awkward and the way we deal with this, but I’d be happy to listen to other people’s perspectives on that.

But what I think would be more helpful, is a round of suggestions.  Fellow Anxiety-sufferers!  How do you balance the additional pressures of social interaction with a feminist mindset, with your triggers and mental health needs?

This is Ravelry Mondays, a weekly event where I pick three-five patterns seen on Ravelry that week, and share them on this blog.  Some weeks will be themed, and there are some rules.

In order for a pattern to qualify it must:

  • Be on Ravelry
  • Be available for download either on Ravelry or from another website – no patterns only available in print or magazines, but it doesn’t have to be free
  • Have at least one photo clearly showing the item as a whole
  • Have at least one photo where the item is not being manipulated, so we can see accurately how it hangs and fits
  • Must have the necessary minimum information on the ravelry page – sizing info where applicable, yardage, yarn weight, etc
  • Clothing items will only qualify if they are available in plus sizes*
  • Only one pattern per designer per week

*And the plus sizes given must have MEASUREMENTS.  Calling the sizes XS-XXXL means nothing if you never tell us what XXXL is.  I’ve seen a 40″ bust called that, before!

This week we’re looking at clothes for women – cardigans and vests, specifically, suitable for Spring weather.

In accordance with my rules, all of these are available in plus sizes.  Unfortunately, Ravelry designers can fall into the same traps that other fashion designers do, so plus patterns tend to be relatively thin on the ground when you’re just looking at the offerings for a single week.  I had to choose between sharing fewer qualifying patterns, or sharing some that only barely scraped into the plus-size requirements in in-betweeny sizes.  Following the heart of the brief rather than the letter, I chose to share fewer patterns and make sure those I did share had at least a decent number of plus size options.  It’s a damn shame, and I’ll be writing a post on that soon, but in the meantime feel free to check out my Master List of Ravelry Plus Patterns, which will be kept updated.

Escarpment

Escarpment is a simple, attractive worsted-weight cardigan with a sweet, single closure at the bust that hangs beautifully past the bust and onto the hips.  It has some gentle hip darts for shape, and the pattern is available for up to a 57″ chest, making it one of the better, more generous offerings this week.  I especially like that the information provided also includes stating what size the sample shown is, which gives some nice context to the images.  Sometimes simple designs are the best, and this elegant offering is available for download at Ravelry for under £5.

Sweet Hooded Vest

The required inch measurements aren’t provided on the Ravelry page, but looking at the link provided in the details, the 3X size of this pattern fits a 54″ bust, so that’s something.  This is a worsted weight hooded cardigan, making it thick enough to keep the wind out, but the open, sleeveless style and lace pattern makes it a lighter piece, suitable for Spring weather.  It’s an unusual and fun design, that’d work well layered over clothes, and is available for download at Ravelry for just a few pennies over £5.

Window to my Soul

Joji always makes beautiful patterns in a decent range of sizes, and I’ve fallen a little bit in love with this particular pattern.  From the sweet shape to the patterned bodice, it’s a classic-looking cardigan with just a few tweaks to make it fresh and interesting.  Knitted in fingering weight with short sleeves, this is a great light cover-up for sunny but breezy days.  I especially appreciate the photo showing three different women wearing it together, so you can see how it fits different body sizes and shapes.  This pattern is available up to a 56″ bust, and can be downloaded at Ravelry for just a hair over £4, or purchased as part of an ebook of four lovely Summer patterns.

That’s it for this week!  Disagree with my selection?  Seen a great pattern you think should have qualified?  Want to suggest a theme for next week?  Let me know in the comments!

Fresh Samphire

Fresh Samphire (Photo credit: Denna Jones)

Don’t get me wrong, I love Winter comfort food.  Rich beef cobblers with pickled walnuts, spicy haggis and mashed potatoes, thick, vegetable-rich bacon soup with dumplings, creamy chicken pies, and brussel sprouts and chestnuts as far as the eye can see.  But this Winter has been a long one, and it gets to a point where you want something that tastes fresh.  Something simple, that takes no time at all to cook, something crisp.

And if you’re poor like me, if the food shopping is dictated by what’s cheap and what’s on sale, maybe you’re also craving something that tastes of the sea.

My usual supermarket recently did something glorious – it started selling stripey-label smoked mackerel.  Affordable smoked mackerel.  Now, I’m a big believer in buying local and buying from small shops, but right now I am reliant on supermarkets for a lot of things.  I have a great greengrocer, but the butchers closed down and despite this being a coastal town, the fishmonger himself sells more imported, packaged fish than fresh caught local produce.  The wonderful co-ops for food springing up around the country like Catchbox haven’t yet reached my corner of the UK.  So this was BIG, for me.

What better to go with it than a punnet of delicate samphire sprigs?

Mackerel and Samphire Pasta

Mackerel cold-smoked for eight hours and then ...

(Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Sometimes simple is best, and this recipe is definitely simple. 

 

Ingredients

2 fillets of smoked mackerel, flaked, skin off

1 punnet fresh samphire

4 servings pasta

1 knob butter

4 handfuls watercress, washed and picked over

4 radishes

2″ long piece of cucumber

 

Recipe

Bring a pan of water to the boil – do not add salt.  Once boiling, add the pasta and cook until al-dente or to your preferred consistency.  Just before the pasta reaches that point, add the samphire to the pan and cover.  Drain, return to the pan and leave to one side.  Toss the mackerel in with the pasta and samphire.  In a small milk pan, heat the butter until melted.  Finely slice the radishes and cucumber.  Arrange a bed of watercress on the plate, sprinkle around with the radish and cucumber.  Spoon out a serving of mackerel and samphire pasta onto the watercress and drizzle over with melted butter.  Add a little pepper.